I’m an ex drug addict and I am now on methadone. My Nan passed away a year ago. I’m missing her so much, she has left a big hole in my heart, the pain is so much, I feel so sad and lonely. I wish I could just end my life. I cut my arms - the pain in my heart is so painful. That’s where all the blood comes in and out of my body and I feel if I cut myself that it would take the pain away. It works for a few days but I wish I did not do it but it makes me feel better. I also got diagnosed with depression and now I’m on antidepressants. I have also had thoughts in my head that aren’t mine - things like I’m fat and ugly, When I look in the mirror I see a fat ugly face staring back at me. It answers back: ‘look at you you fat ugly slag with a spastic face, you’re no good. Why don’t you just kill yourself? No one would miss you, no one would care, no one loves you not even your boyfriend, not any more. People pretend to care but they don’t. So this is why I’m cutting myself and I’m so sad and lonely and feeling like shit. I wish these thoughts would go away but oh no...they are here to stay.
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